There! No, there, next to the lamp. No, to the left. See it? Is it how you remembered?
No. Because I’m talking utter rubbish. There is a lesson to be learned in this.
Lacking the wherewithal to post anything of relevance, interest or merit, I (your author) find myself poking the keyboard, hoping my unutterably complex brain will dredge up something inspirational. Perhaps under some vast self-delusion, I consider that my meaningless jabber is providing the previously bored reader with what they need – the nourishing, mineral-rich essence of entertainment, wrapped in comfy, fluffy words.
What I don’t consider is that the reader (who is wise, considerate – a learned person of discretion) is not fooled by this. “This person,” the reader opines, “has no idea what he is writing about. This is a waste of my valuable and tax-deductible time.”
That reader is right, of course.
Suitably chastened, I (your author) am both shamed and enervated by the realisation that I am engaging in foolery.
The wise author lays down (stops typing on) his pen (the keyboard) and reassesses his life, becoming a wandering doer of good, giving of himself that he might regain the self-respect the reader had driven from him in that devastating judgement.
But there are no wise authors, only stupid ones who write pithy posts with a desperate yearning to be loved. We are ineffably flawed.
The stupid author, caught in ever-decreasing circles of self-loathing and substance abuse, and the peculiar type of self-hate that comes from watching too many episodes of Star Trek – The Next Generation,is physically, emotionally and spiritually reduced. He turns to drink, self-flagellation and collecting ceramic frogs, to the detriment of humankind.
Do you, revered reader, want that on your conscience?
No, and thrice no. For you are, as had been said previously, wise, considerate and learned. You say, instead, to yourself, “Ha! Good post!” in the comments section, like the blog, tell your friends, give them your dedicated support and love, and then the world is a better place.
Is it too much to ask? You have a responsibility, dear reader. Validate this cheap-shot.